Letter I sent to my former states's child support agency (redacted info originally included in letter)

To Whom it May Concern Within the State of XXXXXX,

I have recently received yet another ORDER/NOTICE TO WITHHOLD INCOME FOR SUPPORT from your fine state. It is with frustration that I am held in such a reduced state of opinion from my former home state. To be forced from the very beginning of my ex-wife's and my separation some years ago to have my wages garnished without due course at my ex-wife's mere request (although I'm certain she holds no bias toward me), is an insult at best and is highly unjust. Never, no, not once have I ever been given the opportunity to show my own willingness and ability to self-pay.

One look at my record of child-support payments during times of self-payment (due to job changes or periods of unemployment) should suffice to convince any rational person of reasonable intelligence that I faithfully do my children's due—even though I strongly disagree with the many imperfections of the rest of the child-support system.

For the parent (man or woman) who must pay child-support at least this much is certain: time spent with children is likely minimal, and is, at best, less than the other parent/guardian to whom child support is paid to. Therefore, the one who is paying the support is so much the loser as not only he loses time with children, but also pays for that time lost. It's an addition of insult to injury. To then allow an ex-spouse to forcefully dictate whether or not his/her ex's wages are garnished just furthers the injustice.

Understandably, wage garnishment is sometimes necessary. But it should be used only when the payor has shown unwillingness to pay. I have clearly not. Therefore I do hereby request that when the load becomes too much to bear and not bending over is too much to ask, I beg of you all, please, kiss my ass!

Yours truly,

XXXXX

Dedicated father of three

Address:
XXXXXXXX
XXXX, XX XXXXX

SSN: XXX-XX-XXXX

DOB: XX/XX/XX

CASE#: XXXXX

I hate fatherhood

I despise cliches. One which I detest the most is the saying, "that which does not kill me makes me stronger." I prefer to turn it around. "That which does not make me stronger kills me." I feel this way about fatherhood. I detest fatherhood. I would wish it on no one nowadays. Too much can go wrong. Too much shit can happen. Call me a cynic. Fatherhood has brought me much pain, thanks to an ex-wife who does all in her power to turn my children against me. Though she has not completely succeeded in this, to some extent she has. I do not see my children frequently enough to know. To speak of the pain I have suffered, however, seems selfish when there are so many more fathers out there who have not seen their children in years or who don't even know where they are. I am fortunate that my children do not hate me and that I still know where they are. Too many fathers have it real tough and my heart goes out to them. Especially fathers who do not have much of a support network to get them through all the shit they must go through. These are the fathers who, according to Just Another Disenfranchised Father (6/20 post), can wind up becoming murderers/suicides. Not that I condone these people's actions at all, but if we all truly understood the suffering of what many of these fathers (and/or mothers) had to endure, we would be much slower to place sole blame on them and much quicker to try to remedy the all too often cause of such horrible acts, Parental Alienation.